This story originally appeared in The Peak, Mustang Media Group’s arts and student culture magazine. Check out more from “The Peak: Sh*t we weren’t told, the Adulting Issue.”
For the dignified, resolute and tradition-honoring frat men at Cal Poly, summer seemed to drone on. Without a situationship to terrorize in person (don’t worry– they still left her on delivered for 16 hours at a time), or pledges hoping to join the brotherhood to bring them endless refills of room temperature beer and Zyns, what on Earth was a man to do?
It seems that those endless summer months were absolute torture, as our poor men counted down the days until they were finally reunited with not just their friends but their BROTHERS.
Oh, the brotherhood. Yes, we’ve heard of a sorority ‘sisterhood,’ but this is totally different. This is the real stuff, the nitty-gritty stuff, the kind of bond that turns boys into men.
For some, that is the case. Some fraternity brothers move on to become carwash aficionados or calendar models, but before you rush to follow in their footsteps, be aware of what lies beneath the surface. Do we really know these men? What they talk about, their hopes, dreams and deepest fears all seem to be a mystery. Do they discuss these while sober? Do they discuss anything while sober?
The whole notion of fraternity recruitment is shrouded in an air of intoxicated mystery, kept secret from the prying eyes of the outside world and behind closed doors.
Inside the brotherhood: Rush and pledging
To investigate this, I sat down with economics junior Ryan Kelly. As a brother of Alpha Epsilon Pi, he had plenty to say about the state of camaraderie in the year 2025.
And for all those who are wondering, the answer to the question burning more than the UTI the health center wouldn’t treat: no, they don’t explore each other’s bodies. Sorry to disappoint.
For Kelly, AEPi turned a bunch of strangers into a group of boys who are now closer than strangers. Pledging as a sophomore, he was looking for opportunities he may have missed out on by forgoing the traditional freshman year recruitment. After the long and treacherous process known as frat rush, he found his new home at AEPi.
But rush was the easy part. Pledging was, and is, in an entirely different realm. I’m sure you’ve seen the panicked faces of a pledge dressed in full business casual on a Tuesday morning, scrambling to find his pin, hoping no one in the frat will snipe a picture to be sent to the pledgemaster, the person in charge of pledging for that chapter.
I would provide other examples, but the secrets of each chapter’s rituals are kept under lock and key. However, from the stories anonymous brothers have inadvertently leaked to me and #pledgetok, these rituals are not for the weak. I’ve heard the term “elephant walk” thrown around, but that’s just about all I can say.
Inside the brotherhood: Secrets and stories
So why stay? Why do these men subject themselves to inane tasks? Well, the answer is found in the relationships formed through their shared suffering.
“Pledges get really close really fast,” Kelly said. “I didn’t even know half of the guys in my pledge class, but it’s a great way to meet people. You’ll know right away that you’re with the right people.” The sheer amount of hours they spend together forges a new understanding of friendship, one defined by their willingness to find community here at Cal Poly.
So even when the dreaded GroupMe alert chimes on everyone’s phone, there’s comfort in knowing that their brothers are getting messaged too. And in between tasks, rituals and their lovely serenades, they find time to share parts of their lives with their comrades.
“We’ve all become friends sober and not sober. I wouldn’t say we know each other’s deepest fears, but we do know each other’s deepest stories,” Kelly said.
With each story they trade, they build a complex and elaborate web of identity, ultimately bridging them together with the random group of strangers they were completely unaware of weeks earlier.
Inside the brotherhood: Beyond the frat house walls
Yet, the brotherhood is an all-encompassing term used not just in a specific chapter, but to describe the presence of fraternity life as a whole. Brothers aren’t just confined by the walls of their own house; they’re granted entrance into a community spanning the entire nation.
Greek organizations encourage familial connections from chapter to chapter all over campuses, connecting boys via social media, leadership summits and LinkedIn requests.
So, at its core, what is the brotherhood? Is it trauma bonding through pledging? The public humiliation rituals to which freshmen are subjected? Sharing stories with the bros over a couple of brewskis? The extensive network of chapters across the country? Based on my insight from Cal Poly’s brothers, I would argue that it’s all of the above.
For more stories from the “Sh*t we weren’t told, the Adulting Issue” check out the featured Peak section on our website or the full edition.
